lauantai 25. helmikuuta 2017

Love Yourself

I didn't want to make this a cheesy post, but I guess here we go. For at least five years now, I haven't quite been feeling good about myself. I could say I struggled a lot when I was 16-year-old. Parents' divorce, boy drama, eating disorder – things many girls come to face. My getaway was an exchange year in California. I got to meet the most big-hearted family that I'm honored to call my second, American family. My eating disorder didn't exactly went away in America but at least I built a more positive body image and didn't give so much thought to my chubby cheeks or to my "extra" skin around tummy.

When I got back to Finland, I lost weight naturally and didn't fall back to my old habits – extreme dieting and binge eating. Right now my eating habits are really normal. I care about healthy food but I'm not obsessed with it like couple years ago. I let myself have a treat without guilt from time to time. I have really overcome my challenges in that area. Sometimes though, I still feel like I'm inadequate. I compare myself to pictures where I was fifteen (and mentally becoming a nutcase). I loved the way my hair was, how my body was lean and my face was clear from pimples. But I also know that without those lessons (what I like to call those negative experiences I made through), I wouldn't be even half of the person I am today.

So my goal for this year? To become a better version of me but still maintain a loving and gentle attitude towards myself. If I don't like something about me, I can either change it or accept it. I am really ambitious and rather try to make a fix than just be ok with something that I'm really not. But it's also healthy to admit that sometimes your powers aren't limitless. I have tried my best and it is enough. 

P.S. The pictures in this post are taken when I was fifteen and we were island hopping in Turku Archipelago. It's the world's largest archipelago with so many pretty places.

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